The Love Litmus Test: Measuring Motive in the Month of Love
- Wendy Aguiar
- 5 days ago
- 3 min read
In chemistry, a litmus test is simple, fast, and binary. It’s a "pass/fail" method used to determine a single, crucial characteristic. As followers of Christ, if our lives were dipped into the solution of the Gospel today, would our love pass the test?
The word “love” is often mischaracterized because we all speak it so differently. In his famous book The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman reveals that there is no one-size-fits-all recipe for loving someone well. My husband and I are currently reading his devotional, and it’s a daily reminder that love requires intention.
Love needs a recipient to be fully expressed.
HARDWARE VS. HEART
When God expressed His love to humanity, it was the ultimate picture of sacrifice and connection. Yet, so many of us struggle to accept that gift because our image of "fatherly love" is pixelated and distorted.
I loved my father deeply, but he was human. He was fighting his own battles while I lived with my mother in a single-parent household and he didn't always show up with the heart of a mentor.
My father loved me at the highest resolution his hardware would allow; he was transmitting a full heart over a dial-up connection inherited from his own past. (And true to form, he hated technology.)
LOST IN TRANSLATION
Even when our motives are pure, we have to learn to speak love fluently in a language the other person actually understands. To love someone without knowing their needs is like shouting a masterpiece in a language they don't speak. You leave the stage breathless, but they leave the room confused.
If the resource of love is so plentiful, why is the harvest so scarce? I suspect we can’t see the forest for the trees. Our past hurts dull our senses. We tune out the sweet music of grace because of the mental noise of painful memories.
THE PERFORMANCE TRAP
Maybe you’ve been there—living in defensive mode, refusing to let the Almighty fill you with life because you're waiting for the "catch."
I grew up with rigid standards. I spent years holding my breath, waiting for the wrath of God (or my mother) to catch up with me the moment I missed the mark. Religion has a way of convoluting love by burying the purest gift under layers of dogma, judgment, and rules.
Here is the truth: God loves us without limits. He does not have hidden terms and conditions.
We wonder why our message of hope is rebuffed by a world that is already on fire. Could it be because our motives are suspect?
BATTLE LINES AND HEARTSTRINGS
It must break the heart of God to see the division of the world creep into the pews of the church. We see "Christians" promote hatred and blast bitterness across social media, trading their heartstrings for battle lines.
Our government is not called to love, although I would throw a party to celebrate any sign of compassion. Yet here we are, professing the name of Christ, while our social fabric is tearing and the vital signs for American empathy have officially flatlined.
We have reduced our Christianity to a club membership or a party affiliation. I respectfully decline that identity.
I choose to measure my motives against the straight stick of truth. The Bible pulls no punches: we are commanded to walk in love. Love has no allegiance to anyone but God. A heart of criticism reflects darkness; love lives in the light and amplifies goodness.
THE TEMPERATURE CHANGE
As Valentine’s Day approaches, remember that love isn’t about candy, romantic gestures, or overpriced flowers.
The mandate to love is the only litmus test that confirms our total surrender to Christ.
The recent arctic blast reminded me of a spiritual goal: I want to change the temperature of the room I'm in, rather than just reflecting it—or worse, adapting to the cold.
This month, I am asking God to expand my capacity to love. Purpose to love others well and challenge the hate in this world rather than being consumed by it.
The test is coming... let the cram session begin!
"Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth."— 1 John 3:18 (NIV)
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